After much delay...

...I'm finally getting around to another post, a month later. It's been a whirlwind eight weeks so far, but I finally feel like a cog in the per se machine.

What amazes me most about the past couple months is how singular my focus has become during this externship. I have hundreds of unread articles in Google Reader, a stack of The Economist magazines that have never been opened, a dozen phone calls to return, and a long list of things to do and see.

Six years ago I would have absolutely loved this arrangement. I was all about "being on a mission." In college I came across a particular definition of the word "unity" that I used to keep posted above my desk: "unchanging singleness of purpose & action." It was my inspiration. Looking back at my high school and college experience, I am amazed at how well I was able to maintain a singular focus on my goal. Nothing else mattered.

These days, I find that I no longer love this brand of "unity." I actually miss those things that I have forsaken. I think my goals have shifted away from unity and toward balance, which (with its implied multiple foci) I absolutely despised in the past as a dilution of purpose. Now that I think of it, though, my past aversion to balance versus unity probably stemmed from its greater difficulty to achieve. I always associated balance with compromise (which I still despise), based on the premise that balance required subordinating one focus to another. I think I need to check my premises. Juggling multiple priorities while affording them equal importance is possible...it's simply more challenging.

If you're wondering what has spurred my philosophical musings, other than the many hours each week I spend picking greens, it was a post titled "You're missing out." on the blog line cook.